bEEdEEgEE

bEEdEEgEE is the mealy-mouthed, self-consciously arty stage name of Gang Gang Dance’s Brian De Graw, whose debut album’s appeal will likely vary with one’s tolerance of mealy-mouthed, self-consciously arty gestures. Even if, though, you can forgive the chin-scratching-but-actually-nonsense track titles full of parentheses and haphazard capitalisation, there’s not a huge amount of musical nourishment here anyway.

Centrepiece ‘(F.U.T.D) Time Of Waste’ is the record’s highlight, operating on dual levels of pleasing looseness and deeply gridded house thud, with Alexis Taylor’s tuneful paean to staying in bed bubbling over the top. Elsewhere, Lovefoxx does her best to sex-up a lifeless imitation of College’s ‘A Real Hero’ – and nearly succeeds – but the majority of ‘SUM/ONE’, peppered with samples from motivational speakers and hypnotherapy tapes that attempt at a deeper meaningfulness, is unremarkable: across its 45 minutes, it moves with neither light-footed confidence nor particular gravitas.

Like a nervous panel-show comedian, ‘SUM/ONE’ is desperate to be taken seriously while simultaneously playing the fool in tacit acknowledgement that its primary objective won’t be met. The result is an incoherent mess with neither substance nor wit: it shines in brief moments, but its ultimate legacy is a lesson in the folly of self-important silly names, with the music underneath, unfortunately, bland and broadly forgettable.

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